Children who have parents going through a divorce have some specific challenges that they are going to think about throughout the process. It is up to the parents to determine how they can help their kids to go through this. It isn’t always easy because the child’s age, maturity levels and similar factors impact how the minor adjusts to the situation and what help they will need from you.
One of the common reactions that children have is to blame themselves for the split. You and your ex have to make it clear that the kids didn’t play a part in the decision to divorce. Even if the stress of raising them did have a role in it, you can’t let the kids blame themselves. Reassure them that this was an adult decision.
Another reaction that they might have is to hope the divorce will fall through. It is perfectly normal for kids to think that their parents will get back together. They may even assume that if they behave, things will go back to normal. You know that this isn’t the case, but they will latch on to any glimmer of hope.
Some children might become angry and act out of character. In this case, you have to help them find productive ways to adjust to the new way of life. Work with them to learn suitable ways to get their anger out.
Having a parenting plan in place can help to provide your children with stability since it gives them a schedule and expectations. You and your ex can try to work out the terms of the plan quickly in the divorce so that you can work with your children to get everything set up to reflect the new way of life